Hark Back

Like most people on the last day of 2018, I am reflecting on the year and setting intentions for 2019.  I had a hark back moment which returned me to the origin for a large chunk of my hurt this year.  I have grieved a friend who is still alive.  I am grieving a friendship that has ended or maybe has just hit a roadblock.  Whatever the outcome or finalization of this once deep and true friendship may be, I am letting it go.   The friendship is deeply rooted to my high school days and I honestly never thought it would be a friendship that landed where it has, at the end of this silent road.

This friendship is no longer an active part of my life and at no fault of no one in particular.  Well I guess maybe it’s perceived to be my fault because my friend does not support my decisions.  I don’t know but I’m no longer trying to figure out something that I cannot control. What I can say is that I’ve been honored in the knowing and crossing paths with this person and I wish them happiness and love.  Truly.  Maybe one day we will reconnect but I cannot hold on to the possibility of a maybe and rest assured in the knowing that it will flow like it once did.  I’m not certain that it can ever be the same again.  It is so very hard to say goodbye at the end of this road.

I’m excited for 2019 and growth in many aspects of my life.  I’ve got a few intentions written down so that I can turn them into a goal but I choose to keep those private.  I’ve never been a big resolution person.  I’ve always just wanted to grow and give more of myself each year and experience something new or different. Different, Better, More.  I hope 2019 brings you abundant love, happiness and good health.  Do something different, grow into a better you and give more of yourself to those that value your being.


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